


The Meaning of the Bouquet

by theta_nebula



Category: Neon Genesis Evangelion
Genre: M/M, comic version
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-04
Updated: 2020-12-04
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:14:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27875185
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theta_nebula/pseuds/theta_nebula
Summary: English is not my native language. I’m trying my best to translate it. I also posted the Chinese version. You can discover it on my homepage.
Relationships: Ikari Shinji/Nagisa Kaworu
Comments: 3
Kudos: 16





	The Meaning of the Bouquet

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [花束的意义](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27875150) by [theta_nebula](https://archiveofourown.org/users/theta_nebula/pseuds/theta_nebula). 



> English is not my native language. I’m trying my best to translate it. I also posted the Chinese version. You can discover it on my homepage.

“Shall we go for a walk?”  
I have been staying at Nagisa’s home for the whole day. I guess he can’t stand it anymore, so he advises. Actually, I am not willing to go, but it seems that he’ll be annoyed if I refuse him. So I agree to go. I still haven’t change, keeping reading people’s faces, or I can’t survive.  
So I’m pulled out by him. Music can moisten people’s mind, he says. So he would like to take me to the piano, which is at the place that we first met. I don’t know how to play the piano and I don’t have the mood to play. But even if I refuse, I can’t tell where to go. So I go there with him.  
By the time the sun is setting, it redden the cloudless sky, looking bloody. The wind begins to blow. In the endless summer, I am not supposed to feel cold, but I do. I slightly shake and Nagisa is aware of my shaking.  
“Are you cold? May I hug you?”  
“How dare you. ”  
Maybe I am still of bad sorrow, I say something really hurts him. Nagisa shrug his shoulders and shuts up.  
We walk for a long time, finally reach the place. It has become darker. That’s good. It’s better to return home right away.  
“Wait for a second,Shinji-kun.”  
Nagisa holds my hand, take me to the lawn, searching for something. I don’t refuse his hand.But I think it is because I don’t even have time to react to it.  
“Ah, that’s it!”  
I move my eyes to where he is looking. There is a mound on the ground. What’s that? Why does he show it to me?  
“I buried it... I’m so sorry! I did something terrible that day, at least I shouldn’t do it before you.”  
“It’s not like you. Did you do it to please me?”  
“Maybe you’re right...”  
All right. I don’t want to reflect any further. I pick a couple of white daisies and put them on the kitty’s tomb.  
“What are you doing, Shinji-kun?”  
“You buried it, however, you don’t even know what I am doing?”  
Nagisa shakes his head. I explain for him that we usually offer something beautiful, such as a flower to mourn someone.  
He looks like to think about it. I don’t understand what should be thought about. But it is completely dark and colder. We have to return.  
After arriving home, I am worn-out, but Nagisa is still energetic, watching the TV.  
“Why does the man give a bouquet to the woman? The woman is not dead.”  
“That’s another story. Beautiful things are not only for the dead, but also for someone you like.”  
“Ah...Got it.”  
He is just like a pupil who just figure out a math problem. He turns off the TV and the light, yawns and lies down. I am also exhausted, so I fall asleep quickly, by the side of Nagisa. I don’t have a good sleep. I don’t have a nightmare, but I can’t breathe smoothly because I feel like there is a rock on my chest. Even so, I don’t wake up until 9 a.m.. When I open my eyes, Nagisa is not by my side. Somehow, I feel a little upset.  
When I’m about to get up from the bed, he returned home and hand a bouquet to me. The bouquet is well packed, seems bought from the flower shop. The main part is a few sunflowers, embellished with some bluish violet florets. The bouquet gives off a pleasant smell.  
That’s wired...He gives me a bouquet? But it does make sense, because he seems to like me.  
“Thanks. But I won’t accept. I return it for you. ”  
“Oh, no...”  
He looks frustrated. I can’t stop reading others’ faces, so I correct myself:  
“Okay, I accept it, and I give it back to you. ”  
“No. It’s not the time. When you truly like me, give it to me. ”  
Then I would probably see the flowers fade, I thought at that time.  
But I don’t expect that he died.  
I had my mind goes blank, staring at the bouquet and recalling what has happened these days.  
The flowers begin to fade away. The sunflowers become dark because of oxidation. But the bluish violet florets still look fresh.  
It’s not proper to be given to the dead.  
No, it’s time to recognize that I am fond of him. I will give the bouquet to the one I love.  
But where I should go to send it?  
I put it into the waste bin.


End file.
